belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
