...so i touched it.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
