You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize