In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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