a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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