the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
