I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
