I've blown a few things in my day
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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