Your mouth is God's brothel.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
