Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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