apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
pray to the hookup gods
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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