How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
