You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
