Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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