Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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