small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
