the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
