Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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