He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
