Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Can you bring me the toilet please
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
