I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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