omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize