I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
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I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
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I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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