the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
