i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
