Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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