ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
