I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
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