I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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