Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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