this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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