I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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