Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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