America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I currently don't understand fingers.
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