but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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