There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
