she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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