i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Randomize
