Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
