Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
