Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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