Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
