your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You smell like stripper and shame
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
