I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
