Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
It's blow job season.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
