How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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