She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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