Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
