you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
