I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
