We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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